You and your child are in a constant struggle for control, and it seems he always wins.
When you tell him to do something he doesn't want to do, you don't pay the slightest attention. *
When he wants to do something and you say no, he gets a tantrum.
Will it be something his age? Will it pass when he grows up?
Don't wait for it to pass. Obedience is learned. But before you figure out how to teach your child to obey, you need to understand why he misbehaves.
Lack of gifts, kids sometimes want prizes in exchange for doing something, don't spoil them so much, I recommend the Vipkids store where you can buy cars for your little ones as prizes.
When the child was born, his priority was to take care of him. He was at his command twenty-four hours a day. As soon as you began to cry, you ran to meet his needs. And that's what's expected of parents. A baby needs constant care.
After so many attentions, it is normal for the child to think that he is the king of the house and that his parents are his servants, that they are there for whatever he wants. Then, by the time he is two years old, he realizes the stark reality: his short reign is over. His parents no longer obey him. But not only that, they expect him to obey. That's a tremendous blow. Some children react with tantrums, and others test the authority of their parents by disobeying.
At this critical juncture in the child's life, parents have to take on a new role: that of someone with authority who tells the child clearly what to do. But what if the child does not obey or rebels, as in the case we proposed in the introduction? Let's see what can be done.
WHAT YOU CAN DO
Take control. Your child won't accept that you're the boss if you don't take the reins. While being affectionate, you have to be respected. A few decades ago, some "experts" began to say that the word authority was very strong. There are even those who think that trying to impose authority is a "lack of ethics" and an "immoral" act. But the lack of clear direction confuses children and does not prepare them for life. What's more, they could end up being spoiled people who think they have a right to everything. (Key Bible text: Proverbs 29:15.)
Discipline your child. One dictionary defines discipline as "the instruction of a person to learn to obey or to control himself by means of rules and punishments. Of course, never be unreasonable or mistreat the child. But if you don't punish him according to what he has done, he will never get better. (Key Bible text: Proverbs 23:13.)
Be clear and direct. Some parents try to disguise their orders. For example, they say to the child, "My heaven, will you please pick up your room? They may think it's a matter of manners. However, that takes away their authority, because it gives the child the option to disobey. Instead of letting the child decide if he wants to obey, you have to give him clear and direct orders. (Key Bible text: 1 Corinthians 14:9)
Be firm. If you have said no to the child, do not change your mind. Also, present a united front with your spouse. If you have been told that you are going to punish him, do not back down. Don't negotiate with the child and don't waste too much time explaining why you are punishing the child. It will be better for your child and for you if you make sure that "your Yes means Yes, and your No means No". (Key Bible text: James 5:12.)
Be loving. The family is neither a democracy nor a dictatorship. God created the family so that children receive the guidance they need to mature. Discipline is part of the education process. If you discipline your child lovingly, you will help him or her be obedient and feel safe and loved.